obesity

            Let me start by thanking Katie Mel. I checked google blogger the other day because I was showing my cousin what I did in my journalism class last year. I saw she was still blogging and it inspired me. I figured "well I do have an active blogger account". Might as well talk about nothing to nobody. Thanks Katie, I've been needing a creative outlet. BTW, your blog is hilarious and relatable.
            Now, as a fat person, I know appearances can be embarassing. I've never had fat pride like I do with 'fros, I just have a hard time exercising, due more to motivation than anything. I also do not eat healthy in the loosest sense.
            Thank goodness for fictional characters like Garfield and Fred Flintstone to make a fat person like me feel good about myself. Garfield eats, sleeps and complains about Mondays, just like I do. We both contribute nothing to society. Me writing this blog is me working, pathetic right? Fred Flintstone is a grouch with a huge appetite, just like me. He has a beautiful and tolerant wife, something I will never manage. He has a job, so at least his complaining is legitimate.
            Fat celebrities, how rare they are. Adele, Seth Rogen, Khloe Kardashian, Kelly Clarkson, Josh Peck, Aretha Franklin, and Jonah Hill were never fat to begin with. They were supermodels compared to a guy like me, but in the world of hollywood, they were a bunch of elephants. They've all lost their extra weight and look really great. I'm like Chris Farley or Jackie gleason, I'm just going to be obese my whole life.
            That's right, acording to the Body Mass Index machine I am 35% fat, which is classified as morbidly obese. I sort of shrugged it off. I found that number out when we started working out in my wellness class. I think I worked out to the best of my ability, but I'm not meant to stick to a diet or an exercise regiment. I've never gone on a diet before, the only time I don't eat is during the 25 hour fast on Yom Kippur. That's not that tough for me, if you can believe it. I think of the hebrews in ancient Egypt and I forget I'm hungry.
            This blog will accomplish diddily squat. I'm going to be a fat slob tomorrow. Compare me to an animal, and I think a Pig would be complimenting me. I think I'm a Hippopatamus. Huge stomach, distorted misshapen face, and big teeth. Call this self pity if you want, but I'm expressing my feelings about myself and that's what the internet was created for: so undeserving nincompoops like me get a chance to act smart, tough, and/or big shots for their nonexistent girlfriends. I don't pretend about the latter. I don't want a girlfriend. I'm too cheap, selfish, and aimless to have one, anyway. Obesity kills! Save Yourselves!! Avoid a short lifetime of artery clogging heart stopping foods, I beg of you all!!!